I call my sons my “left and my right” so often, but my guess is that they have no idea what their support means and how they are the invaluable source of my “WHY “.
This week I have been tasked with “What’s your why ? ” in multiple settings. I know from my faith paradigm and how I was raised that my primary purpose is to love, encourage and equip through the light that is God and his hope . My secondary purpose is to make a difference. It isn’t always pretty, and sometimes I fail. That is when I press reset. I’m thankful and humbled by forgiveness and second chances.
When things get bad, I sometimes want to sell and move, cut and run, hide and just plain feel sorry for myself. My family needs me, though. My sons need my example to not quit, to not throw in the towel, and to not be defeated . When the storms of life took my husband so suddenly, He who was my front-line defense to the storms of my past, these are the ones who stood in the gap. My sons, family, church neighbors and friends surrounded me. They drove a “stake in the ground” so to speak to stabilize me, support me, nurture me and allow me a season to heal and to grow.
The landscape of my life looks differently now than it did back then . It’s spring, inside and out. I have raw exposed widow-roots, but above are some exquisite new blossoms (if I do say so myself!). The seasons of life and the storms certainly come and thrash my branches, test my faith and my resolve. I also acknowledge There will be storms ahead yet unknown, because very little comes in the right order, or makes sense in this life.
I know this– I’m preparing, equipping and living, just “doing the next thing”. My husband Dean tragically died, but, I did not die! Winter, spring, summer and fall, the seasons of life push away from that loss and capture my growth in its lens. God has me secured, He is my master support, always in the palm of His loving hands. Blessed Be.