In the months since Dean slipped to heaven, it’s been said to me more than once by friends and family that Nothing is ever really lost as long as we can remember it. I’ve always been a philosopher, long before Dean went to heaven. But now, I’m a bonafide deep thinker with my heart on my sleeve.
Watching home video with my sons until1 am, my heart is overwhelmed. . Hearing my Dean’s voice, laughter, personality. Watching him play at home, hunting, fishing, and with our babies, then our boys. The morning after my eyes are a puffy mess.
I am left with this — I Am thankful for the huge amount of love in my home. We learned that from our parents. Love for each other, for God, for our family and friends , and even love for ourselves because we were happy. But then, there was a time that we got busy . a lot of years there is no Video. Work and life, commitments and ball games, responsibility and obligation, that put us through a long dry part of life’s hum-drum desert. Thankfully, we always got to “water ” in time . Date night, vacations, retreats, quality time — the gift of humor, fun and displayed affection . Healthy marriage , healthy home .
Along the way, we made a few more Corny videos . Thank God ! Priceless and heart-warming. Memories , the live “run-through” of life . And then, it’s done .
Friends — Live like you’re not afraid of the camera . Laugh at the chaos . What else can you do ? Lighten up. Most of us don’t look like models . But we are a gift .
Losing Dean –this is the big thing —
I can be angry and bitter, or I can take the love I gave to him, and spread that love around to all of you.
Memories are to be cherished . Mysteries of the universe, this life, this loss, these great sons, I just accept, knowing perfection is found in heaven, not here. Until then, I have more videos to make .